The Urban Yoga Den

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Heart Is Where The Home Is March 1, 2012

Filed under: Inspiration,Life,love,Relationships,Yoga — Holly Meyers @ 6:48 pm
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In my last post, I wrote, “I feel at home in my heart these days.”  What do I mean by that?

In the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali, the idea of “Samtosha” (sometimes spelled “Santosha”) signifies contentment.  For me, cultivating Samtosha requires a combination of understanding, acceptance and surrender.  When I feel upset or rattled or troubled (vs. content) about something, I ask myself, “Is this something I can change?  If so, what action makes sense?  If not, what practices will help me reach acceptance of and surrender to this uncontrollable concern?  How can I grow to be content with things just as they are?”

First things first – I have to accept that I have little-to-no control over the situations, things and people around me.  I am, however, 100% empowered to change myself.

Interestingly, my life circumstances that seem unfortunate or tragic have actually fortified me – because these hardships drive a commitment to self-knowledge for the sake of personal transformation and serving others.  I have studied and witnessed my behaviors, growth and change as a human being.  So I can’t say enough for self-awareness as a tool for accepting humanness in general.  I don’t even need to understand others – just myself.  When upset by someone, I can either stew in resentment, or, I can change my negative opinion by remembering my own past, process and fallibility.  Acceptance leads me to surrender any illusion of control over people; and this surrender leads to inner peace and contentment.

Second, I must consistently cultivate confidence in, acceptance of and love for my self.  I have to grow to be at home in my heart.  And this take practice.

One of my favorite yoga tools is “Pratipaksha Bhavana” – replacing negatives with positives.  Sometimes my own negative opinion of myself can cause problems all around me!  So I try to use Pratipaksha Bhavana to tune into the positive and cultivate a content mind.

When Pratipaksha Bhavana is not enough, I have to dig into my heart center and find its ever-positive truths.  To do this, I like to use an exercise called “Write from the Heart,” which came from a 2005 issue of Body & Soul Magazine.

In this exercise, I: Identify a specific concern at the top of a piece of paper; write, “I know in my heart…” and finish the sentence with a natural, immediate response; after repeating this about 10 times, I pause, breathe, then keep going until out of things to say.  Knowing that no one has to read this, I can be totally honest, dissolving resistance and building confidence.

I was drawn to write today’s blog because I am in conflict with someone who is dear to me, and, I know that this conflict is a result of the stress, self-doubt and uselessness I’m feeling due to unemployment.  I understand my part (a fear-triggered mind, not shifted quickly enough by the above-described practices!), I accept the other person’s humanness (I felt wronged, but hindsight is 20/20), and I surrender to whatever the situation may bring (we have plans to talk next week).

Still, my heart and mind feel troubled.

So right here, right now (after a pause to brew tea, breath and meditate), I am going to “Write from the Heart.”

  • I know in my heart…there is a chance for healing with this person.
  • I know in my heart…I will find the right work situation and be safe, secure.
  • I know in my heart…my fears are valid but temporary.  I honor them as teachers.
  • I know in my heart…I am not PTSD-triggered and insecure…although sometimes, due to certain situations, I can be.
  • I know in my heart…I am not an aggressive person, although due to some situations, I sometimes can be.
  • I know in my heart…I am a loving, caring, generous and connecting person.
  • I know in my heart…I deserve.
  • I know in my heart…the right job awaits me.
  • I know in my heart…there can be healing with this person.
  • I know in my heart…I have already learned about myself from this situation.
  • I know in my heart…I am useful, helpful and of service.
  • I know in my heart…although my past sometimes trips me up, my present is bright and hopeful.
  • I know in my heart…I do not need to be afraid.
  • I know in my heart…I am loved, thought about, cared about.
  • I know in my heart…all will be exactly as it’s meant to be.
  • I know in my heart…I yearn to and have tools to come from my loving, confident, clear, true heart.
  • I know in my heart…how lucky I am to be willing to grow and learn and change.
  • I know in my heart…love is out there…and in here.

Wow.  (Big exhale.)  That was intense.  And awesome.

When I am accepting of and surrender to the truths in my heart, I feel at home there.  This healthy heart then rules my perception, my thoughts, my actions, my interactions.  I might not have control over situations, things and people – but my truthful, accepting and content heart may certainly have an effect.

I know today is March 1st, but I want to thank you, dear readers and students, for spending the month of February moving, exploring, and opening your hearts with me.  I am honored.  OM Shanti, Shanti, Shanti.

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2 Responses to “Heart Is Where The Home Is”

  1. Beautiful post. Much like gratitude practice, the exercise above feels very cathartic and empowering. I will have to try. We must be on the same wavelength (again). I was just bubbling up a bit on Pratipaksha Bhavana myself. Be well!

    • Holly Meyers Says:

      Rachel! Thanks for the positive comment and please forgive my delayed reply. Curious to learn whether you tried the exercise for your heart! And, haha, I just touched upon the infamous Pratipaksha Bhavana again in the latest… Such a powerful tool. OM Shanti. h*


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